If you consider yourself an adult, it doesn’t matter what you think you’ve accomplished – if you get a penny from your parents, you’re still a child. Period.
My wife’s best friend hasn’t worked a day in her life. Let’s call her Lisa. Lisa gets to enjoy all the fruits of labor that a normal, working adult earned, without having earned it. The worst part – she thinks she earned it.
She mooches off her parents but she doesn’t think she’s mooching. She says stupid things like “Oh what else are they going to spend their money on” and truly believes she’s getting what she deserves. She even has the balls to call other people moochers.
Lisa looks at my wife, who works a full time job, commutes to work, manages deadlines – and sees herself no different – because Lisa has all the same things my wife has. Earning them is irrelevant. She thinks having those same things make ls her equal. As smart as she thinks she is, she’s not very bright – obviously.
This is the worst kind of spoiled – justified spoilage. A mooch who thinks she’s not a moocher.
Lisa has a nice apartment, new car and vacations twice a year. Her parents finance her life. She’s 35 years old – that’s not a typo – she’s in her mid thirties…and oblivious to the fact that her lifestyle is something 99.9% of people work hard to achieve. Since she has all these things given to her for free, she fancies herself an accomplished adult that deserves everything she has. She has no job and no ambitions but she thinks she’s an adult.
Real adults don’t get money from mommy and daddy – that makes you a child
On the outside, she has it all. The apartment, car, and everything a normal “accomplished” adult would have. But no means to pay for it. It’s all a lie because she never earned any of it. The mere fact that she has all of these things is meaningless if someone else is footing the bill. She doesn’t see or care to see the difference.
She’s a full time grad student. She even tried her hand at marriage. She swipes the credit card, signs the mortgage papers, and writes the checks for her wedding planner. Her parents fill her bank account every month so she can afford her life. It’s disgusting. I’m not sure how she justifies this but she does somehow.
Doing adult actions doesn’t make you an adult
If you’re parents are rich, kudos – enjoy the good life! But don’t pretend you earned any of it.
It doesn’t matter what your life looks like. If you didn’t earn any of those things, you’re no different than a high school kid living at her parents house. But Lisa isn’t a high school kid. She’s 35 years old. Who the hell still gets money from their parents at that age? There are moochers – then there are people like Lisa – a whole new level.
Lisa’s parents are the worst kind of rich folks. They don’t buy her things or go with her to buy things. They fill up her checking account and let her pick out, sign, swipe and write the check.
This makes her think she’s doing it on her own. She actually believes that when people say “it’s hard buying a car” that the actual act of picking a car, choosing the color, and signing the papers is the “hard” part.
So she feels like an adult and gets to skip the hardest part of buying something – the part where you PAY FOR IT. She’s a child in a grown up body. It’s sad.
You’re not fooling anyone
Everyone knows she’s spoiled rotten and that’s fine. If you’re lucky enough to be born with rich parents, kudos to you. Admit it and move on. The problem is she tells everyone who’ll listen that she earned everything she has. Everyone knows but being the polite circle of friends, no one says it out loud. But everyone knows she didn’t buy a condo, just like she didn’t pay for her own car, school or wedding. How could she? She’s a grad student.
If she just said “yeah, my folks gave me all this stuff” no one would care. But she does the opposite. She tells everyone she earned everything she “accomplished” and she’s not fooling anyone.
I don’t know anyone else in their mid 30s – that is still on mommy and daddy’s T-Mobile plan. It makes everyone that actually did buy and accomplish things by themselves feel like their accomplishment wasn’t difficult because she’s chosen to catapult her way into adult-world and takes credit for everything she’s never earned.
It reminds me of dumb teenagers who have kids and start acting like they’re real grown ups now. No – real grown ups wait to be married and financially stable before creating children to raise and take care of, you simpleton.
Every time she posts her quarterly vacation photos on Facebook or complains how hard it is to survive as an adult with bills, everyone’s too polite to tell her to shut the hell up.
Being an adult means you support yourself
You’re not an adult until you, at the minimum, support yourself fully. If you don’t, you’re not an adult. No exceptions.
There’s no reason or excuse, aside from being a kid, that makes it OK for your parents to give you money. Obviously, if you can’t even do the basics like support yourself, don’t even think about getting married, having kids or anything else that is reserved for actual adults.
It amazes me how many people are “faking” being an adult – I’m talking about people who are in their twenties and even thirties getting some form of handout from their parents willingly.
I can’t think of anything else this embarrassing and you should feel like a total failure – because if you’re being supported by your parents at any age outside of your teens, you are an utter and complete loser – not an adult. You’re not “adulting” – you’re failing. In life. Stop.
If you’re not an undergrad student and you’re doing any of the following, you’re a loser and you need to get off your ass and start living like the rest of us:
- You’re still on your parents cell phone plan
- You don’t pay for your own home
- You don’t pay for your own vehicle
- You have a credit card that’s still linked to your parents – as a co-signer, authorized user or whatever else
- You can live at home but you choose to be “independant” – and by “independant” I mean you live not with your parents but your parents still pay for your home
- You ask your parents to buy you things – or arrange for them to buy you things
- You take gifts from your parents when it’s not your birthday
- Tgey pay for your trips
- They put you on payroll in their small business but you don’t actually work there
- You mooch anything off your parents whatsoever
As you can guess, Lisa has a hard time getting a job. She’s got a bachelors, masters and is working on her pHD. But no one wants to hire her because she hasn’t ever developed a work ethic.
The few times she’s tried to get a job, she overshoots for management or even executive level positions and is basically laughed out of the room. For someone who hasn’t even had an internship, she considers herself truly important. Amazing.
The result is that Lisa is a moron. She’s immature on every level because she has yet to fulfill the most basic, fundamental part that makes you an adult – supporting yourself. She looks at every other normal adult and compares herself – even fancies herself – to be one of the “adults.” Because in her eyes, having the apartment, car and credit card makes you a grown up, regardless of who pays for it. As a result, she’s pretty much failed in every other part of her life. She can’t finish her latest degree. Hold down a matriage. Get a job. She can’t do anything right because that’s the result of being given everything without earning it. You miss the learning experience of earning something for yourself and end up being a spoiled and entitled useless person.
So if you’re old and being supported by your parents, stop bragging. Stop thinking you deserve it, because you shouldn’t have all the stuff you have anyways. Don’t compare yourself with accomplished people because you’re not one of them. You are a spoiled brat that’s overgrown and way too old to be taking handouts. Stop doing adult things because you’re not an adult – and you’re not fooling anyone.